About The AuthorLynda Hilburn writes paranormal fiction. More specifically, she writes vampire books. After a childhood filled with invisible friends, sightings of dead relatives and a fascination with the occult, turning to the paranormal was a no-brainer. In her other reality, she makes her living as a licensed psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, professional psychic/tarot reader, university instructor and workshop presenter.
Her first novel, “The Vampire Shrink” -- which introduced us to Denver Psychologist Kismet Knight and a hidden vampire underworld -- was first released in 2007 and republished (the rewritten, expanded version) by Quercus Books 9/2011 and Sterling Publishing/Silver Oak 4/2012. Book #2 in the series, “Blood Therapy,” releases Fall, 2012.
Several more books are planned. “Undead in the City,” an erotic paranormal novella, “Diary of a Narcissistic Bloodsucker,” a satire/parody, and “Until Death Do Us Part,” a humorous mini-story, are now available in e-form from Amazon.com. “Devereux: The Night Before Kismet” will be available Spring, 2012. Her short story, “Blood Song,” is part of the Mammoth Book of Paranormal Romance anthology, April, 2009.
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18 Things I Love About Vampires
1. They never leave the toilet seat up.
2. They don’t snore.
3. They don’t fight with you over your coupons for the tanning place.
4. They can help you with your history exam.
5. They won’t sit on the couch watching TV when you want to go out.
6. They look good in black.
7. If they break a fang, it just grows back (same as any other body part).
8. They have many creative euphemisms for the word “blood.”
9. They can have sex all night long.
10. They won’t take your last candy bar.
11. They give new meaning to the phrase “he looked at me hungrily.”
12. They won’t eat you out of house and home.
13. They’ll laugh at your jokes (or at least that’s what you’ll think they’re
laughing at.)
14. They don’t walk in their sleep.
15. They wear blood-repellent leathers.
16. As they drain you, they’ll compliment you on your translucent skin.
17. They’ll cart their dead victims out to the garbage so as not to inconvenience
you.
18. There are no legal entanglements: If you get tired of them, you can always rip the covers from the windows, let the sun shine in and watch them explode.
I really am a major vampire fan. Especially the gorgeous, sexy variety.
But if my work as a psychotherapist has shown me anything, it’s that nothing is ever as it appears to be. With my luck, the beautiful, long-haired bloodsucker tapping at my window would have dumpster body odor, blood breath, ragged, yellow fingernails and disgusting substances stuck between his fangs. He’d be incapable of conversation and would, instead, make grunting noises as he grabbed at my tender breasts. The last thing I’d remember would be his sharp canines ripping into the vein in my neck, accompanied by sucking sounds.
Not exactly a best-selling fantasy, LOL.
It’s so much more fun to imagine an astounding vampire like Devereux, the main male character in the Kismet Knight, Vampire Psychologist series. Long blond hair, blue-green eyes, expressive mouth, sculpted profile, body to die for. Geez. Is it getting warm in here?
So, what things do you love about vampires?
I’ll give away a signed copy of The Vampire Shrink to one commenter.
1. They never leave the toilet seat up.
2. They don’t snore.
3. They don’t fight with you over your coupons for the tanning place.
4. They can help you with your history exam.
5. They won’t sit on the couch watching TV when you want to go out.
6. They look good in black.
7. If they break a fang, it just grows back (same as any other body part).
8. They have many creative euphemisms for the word “blood.”
9. They can have sex all night long.
10. They won’t take your last candy bar.
11. They give new meaning to the phrase “he looked at me hungrily.”
12. They won’t eat you out of house and home.
13. They’ll laugh at your jokes (or at least that’s what you’ll think they’re
laughing at.)
14. They don’t walk in their sleep.
15. They wear blood-repellent leathers.
16. As they drain you, they’ll compliment you on your translucent skin.
17. They’ll cart their dead victims out to the garbage so as not to inconvenience
you.
18. There are no legal entanglements: If you get tired of them, you can always rip the covers from the windows, let the sun shine in and watch them explode.
I really am a major vampire fan. Especially the gorgeous, sexy variety.
But if my work as a psychotherapist has shown me anything, it’s that nothing is ever as it appears to be. With my luck, the beautiful, long-haired bloodsucker tapping at my window would have dumpster body odor, blood breath, ragged, yellow fingernails and disgusting substances stuck between his fangs. He’d be incapable of conversation and would, instead, make grunting noises as he grabbed at my tender breasts. The last thing I’d remember would be his sharp canines ripping into the vein in my neck, accompanied by sucking sounds.
Not exactly a best-selling fantasy, LOL.
It’s so much more fun to imagine an astounding vampire like Devereux, the main male character in the Kismet Knight, Vampire Psychologist series. Long blond hair, blue-green eyes, expressive mouth, sculpted profile, body to die for. Geez. Is it getting warm in here?
So, what things do you love about vampires?
I’ll give away a signed copy of The Vampire Shrink to one commenter.
***
Thanks Lynda for visiting!
You heard her! One signed copy to a lucky random commenter. I added a rafflecopter because it's super easy for me to stay timely with choosing a winner. So just enter via the widget at the end of the post, and leave a comment answering Lynda's bolded question, to make your entry count.
Rules:
Must be 18+
Must enter via rafflecopter AND leave a comment
Must have U.S. mailing address to redeem prize
One entry per person
Giveaway ends 11:59pm, May 9th.
Kismet Knight, a brainy Denver-based psychologist with a stalled career and a nonexistent love life, is about to have her world rocked. Not only does her newest patient, Midnight, long to become a vampire, but the teenager insists that a coven of the undead hangs out at a local goth club. The always-rational Kismet dismisses Midnight's claims as the delusions of an attention-starved girl--until bodies start turning up drained of blood and the hottest self-proclaimed vampire ever to walk the face of the earth enters her office.
What's real? What's not? As inexplicable events and romantic opportunities pile up, along with the corpses, Kismet finds herself in a whirlwind of passion, mystery, and danger. But this tough and funny heroine--who doesn't do damsel in distress--is about to turn the vampire-meets-girl convention on its head.
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a Rafflecopter giveaway
I love how deep they are. So raw and real.
ReplyDeleteLauren
p.s. This book looks awesome!
They are immortal so they get to do so much more than everyone else! They always seem to be so risky to! Plus they are usually extremely Hot!
ReplyDeleteThey are hot and sexy and immortal. Thanks for the giveaway. Tore923@aol.com
ReplyDeleteHey, Lauren! Thanks for commenting and for the kind words about my book!
ReplyDeleteDana: I have to wonder if they get bored trying to fill all those centuries! Nice to meet you!
Tore: I totally agree!
I agree with what everyone is saying. Thanks for the chance to win!
ReplyDeleteWhat i love about denver psychologist Kismet Knight is that she knows exactly how to handle her patients.
ReplyDelete